It only takes one person to see someone beyond a difficult experience and upon higher ground for a shift to occur. This takes the ability to see beyond the problem and to travel into a future time where the person is whole and complete, HEALED, happy and prosperous.
No matter what you or anyone has ever done or experienced I can promise you that life can become pretty amazing for you too, it may take a little work and self dedication, but, you can shift and eventually everything you have experienced can and will be used for the good. I promise… please choose you..
holding space is an art and learning the art of holding space is one of the greatest skills you can bring into your own life and the life of the people who you engage with.. Holding space means that you are willing to walk along side someone in what ever journey they’re on without judging them, making them feel inadequate, trying to fix them, or trying to make them bend to your perspective of what you believe their life should look like. When you hold space for other people, you open your heart, offer unconditional support, and let go of judgment and control.
It’s also important to be mindful of who you choose to bring your problems to or discuss someone else’s problems with, remember the power of life and death is in the tongue. therefore what you speak over ypur life, the life of another and your experiences is influenced by what is spoken and each time you repeat a problem it gives the problem more power but if we speak whole, happy, provided for and complete then it builds to the energies of solutions.
Think of a time in your life when you or someone you care about was in the hospital or was experiencing a divorce, loss of a job or financial burdens. If your response was to pick up the phone, call everyone you know and you give the low down and everyone gives you their advise it most likely left you more confused then clear on what you should do as your next step not to mention. Nothing feels uglier then reaching out to someone that begins to tell you how you are wrong or what you should have, could have or they would have done something different. We can be our own worst critic right? It isn’t helpful to have someone else do it for us.
Let’s say someone comes to you with a problem and you find yourself triggered, meaning feeling anger, extreme sadness, fear, sorrow or other heavy emotions, it most likely is not the persons problem that you are truly upset with. but instead it is likely that it is something within you that is asking for your attention and is an invitation to take a look inside and once you heal the aspect requesting your attention then you will then. be equipped to assist. someone else..
Here is 8 steps to help you create a safe space for people to share their darker times and to maneuver through holdimg space with a bit more ease and grace, again it is a art and takes practice and the more you put it into practice the better you become.
1. Give people permission to trust their own intuition and inner wisdom. Remind them that they are wise and that you trust them too. Even if it appears that they are being un-wise. People grow from falling and deep lessons come from times that we have to dig deep to find inner strength.
2. Be mindful of. The amount of information you give someone, too much can create a feeling of not being complete, useless or incompetent. Seems crazy right? But truly there is no one wiser then the inner wiser you.
3. Let others own their power and worth. Again power can be found in hard times, if we are always running after someone to prevent their fall we actually stunt their growth.
4. Keep your ego out of it! This is a BIG one. Someone else’s success is not dependent on your intervention and someone else’s seemingly failure doesn’t reflect upon you. Let someone own their own experiences.
5. Create a space where they feel safe to fall. A baby didn’t learn to walk with out falling and we don’t learnt o grow with out stumbling. When someone falls they can learn, grow, experience transitions and eventually find the strength to stand back up again, especially if we see them as capable.
6. Leave shame and blame out of it and by all means leave the past in the past. Shame, blame and throwing stuff in someone’s face that is experiencing a hard time SURE the hell doesn’t help resolution to occur gracefully.
7. Create a container that is safe for them to openly express what ever it is they are experiencing.. this takes being able to sit in your own darkness befor you are able to sit with someone in theirs. A safe container holds support for someone to talk about traumatic experiences, fears and to let out heavier emotions. Within this container a lot can be released and the sense of the burden is lifted. It needs to be a space where they feel safe enough to fall all of the way apart without feeling permanently broken. WE honostly can NEVER FALL TOO FAR! EVER!
8. Give others permission to choose their experiences and solutions differently then you would. Everyone is here to learn and grow and each person has a plan created just for them, no two people are exactly alike.. again if you are triggered by someone else’s choice there is most likely a lesson in it for you too. Real yourself back in and check into your inner world and ask what it is that you are to learn. Most the time it can be found in resisting life as a stage unfolding within Divine perfection and another chance for you to heal and grow.
As a A mother, friend, daughter and energy practitioner I can tell you first hand that I have been challenged more then once to resolve my own inner turmoil that has been triggered from something I had brought to my awareness by another. It hasn’t always been easy to face and there has been times I have had to reach out to a friend or mentor to hold space for me as I met the inner makings of my own world. I can promise you that It is worth facing your stuff, every time because each time you get to grow and become lighter and brighter and then can assist others more effectively and at a higher level..
one last trick! Sometimes reaching towards a. Nutural party such as a councler, Healer or a emotionally mature friend or family member is the wisest space to unload your disodence as they most likely are not going to be tangeled into all the details and can keep the projections at bay. I personally only share my “stuff” with someone who is skilled and capable of holding space and will forget the experience when it is over and sees me as brilliant, whole and complete as I manouver through dipping into my own darkness..
NOW FOR THE BIGGER PICTURE- you can hold the BISION FOR SOMEONE TO BE WHOLE, HEALED, PROSPEROUS, SUPPORTED, HAPPY, SUCCESSFUL, SUPPPRTED AND LOVED, and if you hold this vision WITHOUT WAVERING NO MATTER WHAT IS PRESENT. The SHIFT HAS NO CHOICE BUT TO EVENTUALLY OCCUR!!! This my friends is POWERFUl! Walk. Y faith and not by sight and claim GODS words as your truth…if you are WILLING TO DO YOUR OWN INNWR WORK AND RISE IN CONSCIOUSNESS YOU CAN HELP RAISE THE COLLECTIVE WHOLE..
many blessings to you all! Please turn towards you and choose to be really good to yourself. You are worthy.
​KristyLee💖StarFire
